iCan't Do This Alone
by iLive iBreathe iCarly
Summary: He leaned up against the doorframe, his hair still wet from the shower and the smell of Axe lingering. I smiled; he grabbed my hands and walked in my room. The rest was a blur; the regret still lingers, one moment to change both of our lives forever.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter one **

**I decided to try this out, please let me know what you think.**

It's been a month, exactly, since the night Freddie and I chose what we wanted without thinking about the consequences. I found out two weeks ago and I haven't told him yet, the regret still stings, I can still feel his skin against mine. What once felt like a spark but left a burn.

"Ugh," I say aloud as I toss my things in my locker rather loudly.

"Dude chill out," Sam says coming up from behind me. "What's up with you anyway Carls? You've been kind of distant lately." She says as Freddie comes from behind me and grabs my waist. I jump.

"It's just me hun." He says kissing me on the cheek. Sam pretends slowly to shave off her head while making a gagging noise.

"Hey," I say my voice crackling.

"Are you okay? I was worried that I said something wrong last night, you were so pale and quiet." He says letting me go realizing I was trying to wiggle out of his grip.

"I'm fine, just preoccupied, I have a lot on my mind, okay," I say a bit annoyed.

"Okay whatever," Sam says reaching in her locker pulling out a three large sticks of Slim Jim jerky then walking away to class leaving Freddie and me behind.

"I'm really worried Carly," he says putting his hands on my shoulders looking me in the eyes. "I hate to see so secretive, I know something's wrong, is it because of last month?"

"No I just need some time to sort things out and I really think we should talk,"

"You don't want to breakup, do you?" my mind goes wild; I quickly decide to speak so he doesn't think that's what I want.

"No of course not, I just really need to talk, is that okay," I slightly ruffle his hair.

"Yea that's fine." Before we could agree on anything else, a voice interrupts us.

"Get to class and stop acting like you know what love is?" Mrs. Briggs says meanly as she slams her ruler against a locker. Bang! scaring Freddie and I, then she walks down the hall.

"Old bag," Freddie mutters under his breath.

"What was that Mr. Benson?" she snaps.

"Nothing nobody said anything," he says innocently.

"Detention! Benson, I want to see you after class," she walks down the hall slapping her ruler against a locker and yelling at a couple making out. Great I think to myself, so much for talking to him.

I wait in the library after school for Freddie; I use my pear laptop to search a topic that's been stuck on my mind all day. I type in teen pregnancies on Google. A bunch of things come up, a pregnant teenager forum, an abortion clinic, Something called the Sally Foundation, adoption agencies, and much more. I don't know what to click. I go with the Sally Foundation; clueless of what it is I read the website.

It shows a woman who is now in her forties who had an abortion and something went wrong causing her not to be able to have kids anymore and also the result of losing her baby at the age of sixteen. I look at the gallery and instantly click something else, it showed many dead babies that were as large as a penny. Well abortion is out I think to myself wondering how someone could be so harmful.

"Hey," Sam says coming up from behind me, I slam my laptop shut before she can see anything. "Every time I see you you're slamming something," she says chuckling. "What was that anyway?"

"Oh um just some research, for class," I say quickly hoping she can't tell I'm lying.

"Right," she says dragging the word showing me she doesn't believe me but wasn't going to push anymore. "Anyway I have been looking all over for you I called you like 15 times and texted you too."

"Oh my phones on vibrate." It wasn't a complete lie, it was on vibrate, but whenever I heard it, I ignored the calls.

"Well anyway I need a ride home; my mom got pulled over so she can't come get me." I should have known I think to myself.

"I rode with Freddie and he's in detention."

"Aw what the little fredwina do? Was he late for calling the fire department to get a cat out of a tree?" She says in a sarcastic tone.

"No he called Mrs. Briggs an old bag." She just wont go away I think to myself annoyed of her presence.

"He did! That's awesome," she says laughing. "Well I guess I'll just go with Matt."

"Why'd you ask me if Matt said he'd take you?" I snap.

"Because Carly I think you're not telling me something and I was going to squeeze it out of you but I guess not. Later." She says waves and runs out of the library just to annoy the librarian. Who yells stop running then realizes she yelled and blushes.

Matt was Sam's long time crush he always tells her how pretty she is and how much he likes her, I believe that she doesn't like him but uses him to do things for her, but you never know with Sam -you really don't.

I pick up my phone to check the time it reads 5:30, finally to get back to my research, just as I open my laptop Freddie calls.

"Hey babe-where are you?" he asks. He sounds as if he's somewhere walking, his voice echo's from the empty hallway.

"I'm the library," I answer just above a whisper so the librarian doesn't yell-again.

"Do you want to go home or to football practice with me?"

"I'm not really feeling well, it may be best to go home." I answer gathering my things and closing my laptop.

"I can skip to stay with you, coach won't mind." His coach will mind and I know it.

"It's okay I don't want to have to make you miss it because of me." He sighs loudly into the phone.

"I'm standing outside of the library." He says in an unreadable tone.

"Coming." We end our conversation and I step outside of the library to see him standing alone arms wide open. I fall into his hug I smell his Axe cologne. It doesn't smell as good as usual, I feel nauseated and dizzy. I push off of him, I feel as if I'm about to throw up, I run into the girls bathroom, thank god it's empty, I lock myself in a stall and everything I ate today is revealed.

"Carly are you okay?" Freddie bangs on the door to the bathroom. I look in the mirror after wiping my face with water.

I want to cry but in don't, instead I keep myself together and push open the bathroom door. I'm pregnant.

**Endnotes **

**I have finally decided to post this story after long months of thinking about, (since May) I have planned for it to have many complications with Carly and Freddie also some good things as well. I hope for this not to be sappy but not harsh either but just right. I appreciate you reading this story thank you… reviews are love. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two **

"Benson! What's wrong with you today?" coach Burns yells at me. My mind was stuck on Carly; I had to find out what was wrong with her.

"Nothing coach," I yell back annoyed.

"Then stop being a pansy and act like it! Now run that play again and you had better do it right, we can't have our quarter back failing on us. "

Angrily I slam the ball, thankfully coach not seeing me. Fantastic, aren't I having a wonderful day! I run the play again a lot better this time , though still not impressing coach.

When practice was over I tried to hurry out of the locker room trying to avoid small talk. I had already showered and heading to the door when Gibson stops me.

"Hey man what's up with you? You seem a little distant." he says casually.

"Oh it's nothing I just have a lot on my mind." I reply back wondering if I really meant that.

"Oh okay," I can tell he doesn't believe that but he continues to talk. "Still up for tonight," he says his mood quickly changing into a grin.

"What's tonight?" I ask trying to hope I didn't blindly promise him something.

"Dude it's just the double date with me, LeAnne, you, and Carly that's all." he must have noticed the panic that spread on my face. "You guys are still coming right? He asks hopeful.

"Oh um no-Carly isn't feeling well." I answer shuffling my feet.

"It's okay, we'll meet up again." he says a little let down. We chat a bit more then go our separate ways, him back into the shower area and me out the door.

"Hey Freddie!" I groan, Alana a very irritating cheerleader who does not like Carly, calls me.

"Hey," I mumble she gives me a quick hug.

"So where was Carly?" she says in a tone that bothers me.

"She's sick why?" her face changes but only slightly.

"Hope she feels better," she says in a tone I'm sure that is sarcastic. "A couple of us are going out tonight, care to join us."

"I just said Carly's sick and your asking me to go out with you guys!" I snap annoyed letting off some steam.

"Whatever I was just trying to be nice." she walks the opposite way down he hall. Nice, I think to myself, I almost laugh aloud. Alana trying to be nice that's funny -it really is.

I walk down he hall to the door quickly trying to get away from the school; I'm almost there when Mrs. Abraham her honors history teacher stops me.

"Oh Freddie, how are you dear?"

"I'm fine." I say in a flat tone.

"Listen I won't hold you long, but I was wondering about Carly, she seemed a little distant in class today, is everything okay?" she says lying a wrinkled hand on my shoulder.

"She's just a little sick, that's all." I reply trying to end the conversation by walking a bit up the hall but she follows.

"Well give her, the homework assignments, she was excused and took a very long time and class ended before she could come back." she hands me a piece of paper. We say goodbye and I sling my football duffel over my should and walk out the door.

It's pouring buckets and it's falling quickly I get into my black Dodge Ram. I throw my football duffel in the cab and sit back and breathe. My hair is stuck to my face, and I'm almost drinsed. I sigh deeply, then start the engine, turning the air on blast, letting the warm air hit my cold skin. I feel relaxed. My cell phone rings disturbing my peace.

"Coach," I say as soon as I answer the phone.

"Hey Benson, you left yet?" he says in gravely tone. "Don't you lie to boy." He says in an even gravely tone than before. I look and see him leaning against the door to school.

"No I'm still here." I want to yell or hang up the phone but I keep my peace until we hang up. I no time at all coach is at my car. I roll down the window.

"You're gonna leave an old man like me standing in the rain?" He says totally pissing me off.

"You didn't ask," I snap.

"What was that now?" he says putting his finger to his ear as if he didn't hear.

"Nothing," I say back quickly and unlock the door. He gets inside of the truck.

"Nice truck you got here boy, how much it cost ya? About $15,000, right." He says running his dirty fingers across the smooth upholstery.

"What does it matter?" I snap again not looking him in the face.

"I suppose your right, it's not what I came for anyway." I am shocked by his answer, wow!

"Okay," I say glancing at him without him catching me.

"I came to talk about your playing; you're a strong boy Benson. You have a lot going for you, good grades, nice background, good looks, and most of all you're a fighter." He says toying around with different objects in my car. He picks up a penny from my coin slot in between the seats.

"You see this penny here?" he asks putting it in my face.

"Yea," I say backing away.

"What's on it?" he asks sticking it closer.

"A face," I reply giving up on trying to back away.

"Whose face?" he says in a rough tone sticking it even closer to my face.

"Abraham Lincoln, coach! His face." I say in a sharp tone.

"Do you think he was put on this penny that we use everyday all over America for nothing!" he says his voice raising.

"No sir," he seems angry very angry.

"What did he do to get on here?" he asks his voice calming.

"He worked for it, did whatever he had to do without fault." I say trembling.

"Benson, he worked hard without letting his personal problems interfere with his work, you hear?" he says his voice raising again.

"Yes sir," I reply.

"Will this be you?" he points to the penny. I almost want to say no but afraid he'll slap me across my face.

"Yes sir," I reply in an uneven tone.

"Okay," he says then steps out of the car and walks back into the school.

I bang my head on the steering wheel very hard, great!

**Endnotes**

**Ooh Freddie seems stressed, I wonder how he'll react when he hears the news, or will she tell him…hmm. His whole world seems to be crashing down in him…or is it? Okay enough with the annoying questioning sorry for not updated :P but I did now so yay! Anyway I hope you have enjoyed this chapter of iCan't Do This Alone, and will continue to read and review it. Well as I always say read, dream of dinosaurs, and review! ~ Thanks. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three **

"Sam I thought you believed me earlier, I said I'm okay, okay!"

"Carly, I just really am concerned, I believe you now though." Sam says sincerely into the phone.

"So are you still with Matt?" I ask frowning, as I see Freddie walk up to my door and lean against the frame hesitates then decides to walk in. He looks hot his hair wet from the rain outside, his white v-neck drenched showing each of his well-defined muscles, still not able to shake off my anger though. I look at my watch 9:08pm. He's late very late.

"Listen Sam," I say before she can even reply to me. "I gotta go fill me in with details later." I click off before she can say anything back.

"Hey," he says by now at my desk tinkering with something on it.

"You're late! What took you so long?" I ask pushing the cake eraser from his hand that he was playing with.

"Geez Carly calm down I just got caught up, that's all." He says putting his hands up as if he's surrendering.

"Well next time 'call up' when you get 'caught up' okay!" I snap with a bad attitude.

"Carly I'm sorry coach has really been giving me a rough time, I'm having a bad day okay!"

"A bad day! That's bull crap Freddie everybody has bad days, I'm having a bad day too!" I yell _what's gotten into me? _I ask myself weirded out by the sudden emotions.

"It's not all about you Carly, okay I understand you had a bad day, but I did too,"

"So and what is that supposed to mean, am I supposed to just fall in your arms, oh honey dear darling I am so very sorry, your having a bad day. Come now I just made a fresh batch of cookies, no Freddie no!" she stops to catch her breathe, "Did you even think to ask how my day was, no, oh and when I rushed into the bathroom. When I came out you weren't there. Explain that Freddie!" I shove him in the middle of the chest.

"Carly I am so sorry I was-"

"Yea busy I know with all that stupid football crap, I stood and waited in the rain for Spencer to pick me after work!" I was furious with Freddie he had screwed up beyond no point of return.

"Carly," he says moving very closely to me. The smell of him entering my nose again. I felt it coming. I ran into the bathroom quickly shutting myself inside not bothering to lock the door.

"Carly! You can't just keep locking yourself in the bathroom every time I come near you just break up, it will be a lot easier." He says I can hear him going to the door murmuring under his breath.

"Freddie! Wai-" I am cut off by the sudden revolt of my stomach. I hear him drop something most likely his football duffel and run to the door, he opens it and stares at me while at my worst.

"I'm pregnant." I say in a tiny voice.

**Endnotes **

**Sorry for the shortness, yadda yadda yadda and I didn't mean to keep you waiting so long for another update yaada some more. I hope one day we will all join hands and sing songs? Yes that was random, but who cares, who watched iStart A Fan war. Blah! I did and I was very disappointed thumbs down Dan! Anyway read, buy batteries, and review! ~Thanks **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**Month Two **

**Friday July 1st **

"You're what?" I repeat back to Carly stunned making sure I heard correctly.

"I'm pregnant Freddie; I'm going to have a baby!" She says in an almost angry voice between hard sobs.

"Wha- Bu- How?" I say not able to get my words out of my mouth. I watch Carly crumpled on the floor in the corner of her bathroom. Her normally pale face, paler than usual- wet with tears. "Carly," I say in a sad breathy voice and walk into the bathroom and pick her up off the floor. I felt shivers run up and down my body as I picked her up. I walk out of the bathroom and lay her on the bed.

"I'm sorry, I am so sorry," she says repeatedly as I lay down beside her.

It was obvious, it all fit together, the sickness the mood swings everything. I missed it, I was so caught up in football and school, and I feel terrible. I began to comfort Carly by running my hands through her hair calmly. Our lives, changed we were left to face every single problem that was yet to come. Everything we put first or thought was important was now last on our worry list; bigger troubles were on their way.

"Freddie." Carly choked out still crying.

"Yea hun." I say gripping her chest from behind her.

"Please don't leave me-" Instantly tears take over her again ceasing her ability to speak. I stare into space scared, unexpectedly my eyes begin to feel wet and a tear rolls down my face, I wipe it just as fast as it came so Carly doesn't see me.

"Would the Freddie you know do that?" I ask as I try to keep from crying. She doesn't answer for a while; she just continues to sob quietly.

"I'm not sure." She says barely above a whisper. I hear her answer and see her reasoning, I sit up and she sits up with me. She looks over at me, scared that I might be angry, but I'm not, I'm just as scared as she is.

"When are we going to tell everyone?" I ask stretching my arms out. She wipes her face.

"Well Thanksgiving is the next holiday so I figured that we could you know, have a big dinner then break the news, I feel it will be better that way with my dad and grandparents being here." She says this without stopping to cry or getting angry.

"Won't it be showing by then?" I ask curiously.

"Of course, but I can handle that I guess." She says a bit unsure.

"Well should I invite my dad?" I ask, she looks over at me, her eyes are red and her face also but she has no tears.

"Freddie, you never talk about you're dad, are you sure you want to do that?" she says in an almost normal voice. I sigh deeply.

"Carly, my dad isn't abusive or a drunk, he has his own playboy mansion, or something like that, he lives about an hour away in a very rich downtown area of Seattle. I'd rather not talk to him but he's my father he deserves to know. Knowing him, he'll probably be proud, a son taking right after his footsteps." I say gritting my teeth angrily.

"I'm sorry," she says noticing my anger then rubbing my arm.

"It's not you're fault, it's my fault, after all the crap my mom put me through I still go and do what I want even though I knew it was wrong. I'm such an idiot!" I say banging my hands on my forehead, I get off her bed and start pacing around her room.

"It's okay." She says in the smallest voice ever. I change my tone instantly and start to talk seriously.

"So we have my mom, your dad, your grandparents, Spencer and my dad?" I ask clarifying the list of people.

"What about Sam." She says wiping her face.

"Oh! Sam of course! Well we'll invite her too." Oh great this'll be fun," I think to myself sarcastically.

"Hey kidos!" Spencer says flinging open Carly's door. "Oh!" he says as he sees Carly "What's the matter." She looks over at me so I can speak instead of her.

"She hasn't been feeling well all day, were not sure what it is."

"Should I stay home, I was going to go to Socko's birthday sleepover."

"No," she says in a voice we can barely hear. We both look at her.

"You sure?" he asks as he sits beside her on the bed and rubs her hair.

"I said that didn't I?" she snaps.

"Fine, fine okay, I'm sorry for asking, Freddie do you mind staying to keep watch on her." He says getting up and walking to the door.

"Sure, I don't mind," I say after a long hesitation.

"Awesome thanks! I'll see you two tomorrow." He says then the opens door and runs down the stairs, his shoes making a loud _clomp _noise as he runs.

I walk to her bathroom and straighten and clean it up, I sigh as I see a box of pregnancy tests I the garbage can, _how could she have not told me? How did I not notice? _I sweep the many Kleenex from her past crying into her garbage can. I walk into her room and put away all the things that are out of position and make the place look nice again.

"Hun," she says walking over to me holding her flat stomach. "I'm not feeling well; I haven't eaten since this morning."

"Carly you have to eat," I say I get up from picking up small things on the ground.

"I was scared; I didn't want to throw up again." She says her face in a look of pain.

"It's okay; you just have to eat the right foods, and that was only morning sickness, and I'm sure Spencer has some healthy food somewhere around here." I say in a comforting voice.

We walk downstairs, my arms around Carly to support her, at this stage, its easy to feel dizzy which could lead to falling, stumbling or worse. When get to the last stair we walk to the kitchen. She sits in the red chair in front of the computer.

"So far we have some bananas, oranges and kiwis." I say as I open the cupboard and pull out a cutting board, then grab a knife out of the stand from off the counter.

I start to cut the fruit, and put it into a nice glass dish; I grab a cup from the cabinet also and find some very healthy green tea juice Spencer had bought two weeks ago then didn't drink it because he didn't like it. I continue to cut the fruit; I glance over at Carly who is just gazing at me with googly eyes.

"Um is everything okay?" I ask as I stare at her while continuing to cut.

"Oh," she says then blushes and looks down.

"No, its okay," I say in a sift voice. She sighs then looks up at me again.

"You're just so mature and nice, I'm glad its you and not some jerk," she says as I walk over to the counter with the cup and the dish with the fruit in it. I stare at her from the opposite side of the counter slightly creeped.

"You're just really great for doing everything that you have done so fsr." She smiles then leans closer to my face.

"That's cause I love you." I say then kiss her. The kiss is longing and sweet. It doesn't feel the same, it feels different, in ways I cant even identify.

"Carly Freddie!" a loud voice booms breaking my train of thoughts.

**Endnotes **

**I apologize for not updating in a while; I've been somewhat busy and hadn't had the time to write. I hope I haven't lost some of my favorite readers or reviewers (which is everyone who is kind and encouraging). I will start on the next chapter after this and write like Speedy Gonzales. Anyway, I hope this chapter was enjoyed, and that you will continue to read this story. As always read and review! ~Thanks! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five **

**Month Three**

**Saturday August 6****th**

We both break apart and turn around scared, only to spot Sam with Matt at the door Sam's hands on her hips.

"What?" we both say at the same time turning around very quickly.

"I called you 20 times Carly and you never picked up you're phone, and I texted you!" Sam says walking into the apartment her hands still on her hips.

"Sam, Carly really doesn't need this right now, she's already having some struggles, and she'll have enough lecturing for a lifetime in the next two months." Freddie says in my defense. Sam's face wrinkles- she must be confused.

"Enough lecturing for one lifetime? What are you talking about?" Her tone is different obviously showing her irritation.

"We need to talk." Freddie says to Sam, his expression very serious.

"Is everything okay? Carly why aren't you talking?" Sam begins to panic she shoves Freddie and sits next to me.

I don't respond- I feel open my mouth I feel that words won't come out and only tears.

"Carly!" She says again shaking my arm.

"Can we talk in private?" I ask glancing at Matt. He is completely unaware, staring at Spencer's latest sculpture: a meatball dispenser.

"Oh, hey Matt talk to Freddie, me and Carly have to go, well be back in a minute." He looks up at her.

"Oh totally."

We walk up the stairs, Sam two steps ahead of me. I feel heavier now, it's harder to walk up the stairs, Sam glances down the stairs at me.

"Carls, come on." She says from the top. I walk up the rest of the stairs and finally making it to the top.

She walks into my room and looks at the mangled sheets, and Freddie's football duffel thrown on my couch. My bathroom is a mess, crumpled Kleenex are everywhere, my clothes are thrown out of my drawers, and there's a random garbage can in the middle of the floor.

"Carly, I have never seen you're room this dirty, what happened?" she asks trying to find a place to sit. "Get it a little bit dirtier and it could look like mine." She makes this joke expecting me to laugh, noticing the fact that I haven't spoken much. Her expression changes, she crosses her arms.

"Carly, what's your deal? Your acting weird?" she says this is more spoken as a demand than a question.

"Have a seat," I say as I clear the couch. Sam isn't the one to take demands but she does so anyway.

"Remember back in June, when you and Matt went to that carnival, and Freddie and I decided to stay home?" I ask calmly.

"Yes, why?" she asks nervously.

"We did something that night, I knew it was wrong, but I wanted it so bad. It was almost like a craving." I say ignoring her question.

"Well?"

"We did it, Sam! I thought it was all I wanted and now I would be more than willing to give it all back." I say surprised I'm not crying by now.

"Whoa!" she says lifting her hands up. "You and Freddie?"

"Yes us and now I- I – I'm-" I can't say it, my lips wont even part to make the sound of the word come out.

"Carly, oh my god, Carly, are you pregnant?" Sam's voice is trembling and she can barely talk. I shake my head not being able to speak.

She stares down at her hands, with a complete lost for words. She looks up at me opens her mouth but closes it. All the pieces of the puzzle must've fallen into place, she must have finally realized I'm not as good as I seem.

"I'm sorry Sam, I know you always looked up to me as someone to be like and I've let you down just like everyone else in my life." I say in a small voice, just above a whisper.

"You haven't let anyone down Carly, it was just a mistake, we all make them, its okay. Besides, you'll only let us down by not being the strong Carly we always knew you liked hiding behind the scenes when it came to mistakes and problems. But it has to stop okay; we won't look down on you or see you any differently." Sam has a serious manifestation, something I have never seen from her.

"Thanks Sam." I say throwing my arms around her. No matter what you do good friends will always be there right when you need them. I think to myself and embrace Sam harder, maybe I can do this after all.

**Endnotes **

**Well can she do this? Can Carly be strong and not let them down? On the other hand, is she to weak to handle this? Hmmmm, well I hope this chapter was enjoyed and no need to worry, I will update ASAP! Reviews are love! **

**Thanks**

**With Love **

**Hannah **


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six **

**Month Three**

**Sunday August 7****th**

I pushed the cart down the aisle, as Carly hobbled from thing to thing, would she ever stop shopping I thought to myself as she picked up a shirt.

"Freddie isn't this the cutest thing ever?" she asks putting it up to her stomach.

"Of course it is honey, I love it." I say in a tone so dead she turns around and looks at me.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I lie, picking up a box of cereal to look like I was doing something.

"Freddie," she says placing her hand on my back, "I know you're starting at UCLA this semester and I was planning to go to Japan for student orient exchange but I decided to stay home. I did some research and UCLA has a special scholarship for people in our situation and they offer special housing, I've already applied and everything we should hear back from them by the end of the week." She says then waits for my response.

"You really want to keep this baby don't you?" I ask putting the box of cereal down.

"More than anything else." She says with a certain look of desperation in her eyes. I wrap my arms around her in the middle of the aisle and embrace her in a tight hug.

We continued our shopping, I'm supposed to be in California two weeks, and I won't go if Carly isn't with me. We have less than two weeks to tell our parents and Spencer and I have no idea how I'm going to say it. I already know what's going to happen so I figure I might as well make it easier for my mom.

"Carly," I say as she's trying to decide which fruit she wants.

"What is it?" she asks putting both of the fruit in the basket.

"We need to tell everyone and fast, listen." I say shoving my hands in my pockets then take them out.

"What?" she says noticing my seriousness.

"I'll tell you later." I say shoving my hands back in my pockets.

"You can tell me whatever it is when you're ready." She says grabbing both of my hands from my pockets then kissing my nose. I don't know what's with Carly but ever since she told me about the baby, she's been all gushy and lovey dovey, not that I'm complaining.

We finished our shopping and headed out to my car, I loaded the bags in while Carly sat in the car.

"I feel helpless just sitting here not helping you." Carly says to me as I put the bags in the back of my Dodge Ram truck.

"If it weren't for you I'd be helpless." I say I put the last bag in the bag.

"I'm sure you'd be better off if I weren't around." She says crossing her arms.

"That's no way to think baby doll," I say as I walk up to her door and put my hand on her cheek.

"I'm sorry." She says uncrossing her arms and putting her hand over mine. I walk around to the driver's side, get in, and start ignition.

"Where are we going?" Carly asks as we drive further from the city.

"It's a surprise." I say veering into the right lane. "Put this on." I hand her a blind fold.

"Okay?" she says a little but hesitant but puts it on.

"How are you feeling?" I ask taking on hand off the steering wheel now that Carly couldn't see, she hates when I do that.

"I feel okay, I'm definitely tired and I feel like everything thing is getting bigger." She says.

"Well those are all natural things so that's good."

"Easy for you to say, I feel like a fat woman." She says gripping her still stomach placing her hand on the small bump. I continue to drive the windows down the cool breeze filling the air, this is one thing I loved about summer it made you feel alive and so happy.

"Were here." I say staring at Green Lake, a very peaceful park in the city.

I walk around to her door open it and take off the blindfold, she looks around, and there's a small picnic blanket setup with a basket on it. The place looks beautiful even I can say that, Sam can be helpful when she's not beating you up.

I've never been to Green Lake but Sam said she went with her mom and dad when things were good and she remember it being very pretty, she was right. It's a busy place but the area we have seem not have as many people in it. Our picnic blanket is under a bunch of Dogwood trees some bloomed pink and some bloomed white, the petals falling from the trees and onto the grass.

"Oh my god! Freddie this is gorgeous!" she says grabbing me and hugging the life out of me. I take her hand and lead her to the blanket Sam had setup minutes before I was really surprised she was actually being nice to me. Carly sits down her sundress looking brighter in the sun she placed a hand on her stomach. I sat behind her putting my hands over hers.

"My book says by month four you can start to feel the baby kick." She says smiling then rests her head on my shoulder. An elderly woman with a Polaroid instant-print camera walks over to us.

"It does so good to see young love," she says smiling so hard "May I take a picture." We nod our heads and she snaps a shot of us and hands it to Freddie.

"Good luck!" she says then walks down the path behind us. I wait for the photo to develop and we both look at the photo.

"You look gorgeous," I whisper in her ear. She giggles and her cheeks turn red just as we were children.

We eat our picnic lunch and we dip our feet in the lake, this by far is one of the best experiences in my life. Just sitting here and being here with Carly makes me so happy. Everything is vibrant and happy. Nothing can express how I feel. We get up and take a walk down the path Carly barefoot, which I didn't approve of but its hard to say no to her. Everyone thought we were like older parents, asking Carly how far along is she and telling her she looks beautiful and her glowing skin. I was beginning to wonder why nobody else had noticed back at home.

We stop in the path to look at a butterfly Carly is so amused by it, her face seems to show the many thoughts crossing her mind right now and right then standing with Carly's hand in mine nothing had ever felt this right. I like being with Carly more than anything else in the world, now or never I thought as I patted my pocket to feel the ring case

I get down on one knee and pull out the diamond ring from my pocket, Carly hasn't noticed me yet but I sit there and wait, as soon as the butterfly was out of sight, she turns to face me.

"Oh my god mom he's proposing!" I hear a teenage girl whisper to her mom. Soon many eyes of bystanders are on us, making me feel a bit pressured.

"Carlotta Everett Shay, will you marry me?" I ask looking up into the deep of her eye. Shocked she stares down at me, her smile so big and so wide, so vibrant, I've never seen her so happy and I've known her all my life.

"Yes!" she says throwing her arms around me giving me another death grip. Everyone around us is clapping; some people are even taking pictures. I take what I said back, because this, by far, is the best moment in my entire life.

**Endnotes **

**Awww, awww, awww, okay sorry I'll stop saying awww, oops. :P Well I hope you have enjoyed this chapter of ****iCan't Do This Alone . **** speaking of which I cant do this alone so I would like to thank all of my lovely wonderful reviewers and took their time and read this story, thank you so much! **

**This chapter took a lot of thought and time to write, because it steers the story in a whole different direction than I started off with. I hope you give me a chance and continue to read this. If you have, any ideas please feel free to let me know. :)**

**Thanks **

**With Love **

**~iLiveiBreatheiCarly~**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven **

"I think we should tell them." I say as Freddie drives back to his dad's apartment. Freddie has been staying with his dad since June and I've been over here almost everyday, I have been with him, his dad lives about 30 minutes from Bushwell and we spend most of our time there. I've never seen his dad but Freddie doesn't say much about him so I think we've been avoiding him after he gets off work.

"Really?" he says reaching to turn down the radio.

"Yes," I lay a hand on his shoulder. "We did something wrong, and now we have to grow up faster than ever and handle what we did. I think that we've made the right decisions about this and were trying our best to make it work, it's going to get harder and were ready for that. The longer we wait the madder they'll get." I say gazing down at the very beautiful expensive looking ring Freddie had gotten for me.

"You're right." He says making and exit off the freeway and turning around. I sigh, Freddie can tell my discomfort because he takes a hand off the steering wheel and grabs my hand and squeezes it.

We get to Bushwell Plaza and my heart is beating, I need water, I wait for Freddie to come around and open my door.

"Carly, you don't look like you're not feeling so good, everything alright?" he asks as he helps me out as I take deep breathes.

"I'm fine," I say as I step down, with Freddie's help, from the truck. I couldn't go in there like that, one look at me and they would know. This was my first time wearing something that could tell in. "I can't go in there like this." I state letting go of Freddie's hand.

"You're right... Hmm" he says thinking.

"Oww." I jump slightly feeling a sharp pain in my chest and stomach.

"What did I do?" he says freaking out.

"Oww oh my god, Freddie take me inside. I lied, I'm not fine." I say leaning on him for support. We walk into the nice air conditioning of Bushwell Plaza.

"What's wrong?" he says panicked.

"I don't know I'm having stomach pains, take me upstairs."

"That's it!" he says as we get on the elevator. "You rest and I'll tell them, my moms coming home from work in a couple minutes and is Spencer home?" he says as we get out on our floor.

"I don't know!" I say irritated.

"Give me you're key." He says holding out his hand, I pull the pink butterfly key from my purse and hand it to Freddie. "I can't let you do it by yourself, wont you be scared." I say grabbing on his shirt.

"Of what?" he says then unlocks my apartment door.

"Spence! You home?" he yells through the open door.

"In my room be out in a sec!" he yells behind a closed door "Oww! He yells again "I take that back, maybe a minute." He says laughing. Freddie sends me into the apartment and up the stairs. I go to the bathroom feeling sick, as soon as I get in there I throw up in the sink about to wash my face. It doesn't get on my hair, thank god. I cough a couple times and rinse it down the sink disgusted. I grab my phone and text Freddie.

Me: Not feeling so good… Threw up in the sink :(

**Freddie's POV **

"What's up kiddo?" Spencer says drying his wet hands on his pants as he walks out of his room.

"I need to talk to you," I say as my phone buzzes. It's a text from Carly.

Carly: Not feeling so good… Threw up in the sink :(

"Everything okay?" he asks sitting down, I put my phone in my pocket trying not to run up the stairs and make sure Carly's okay.

"Depends." I say as I get a call from my mom just as I predicted, she calls everyday at 6:00pm when she gets off work. I tell Spencer I have a call then answer.

"Hi mom," I say ready for her usual greeting.

"Hi Fredward, how is it at you're dads? Is he feeding you? Please tell me he's not taking you to 'his work' with him?" she says sounding a bit worried.

"I'm fine mom and no he isn't." I say chuckling "I'm home actually; I'm over at Carly's and Spencer's."

"You're home! I'm parking now! I'll be there in a minute!" she says hanging up the phone.

"Have a seat you're making me feel weird sitting down while you're standing." He says as my mom burst through the door.

"Freddie!" she says and gives me a death hug, as if I haven't had enough of those today. She doesn't give me a chance to speak. "Aww I miss you!" she says kissing my cheeks.

"Okay, mom." I say grinning wiping my face off. "Please have a seat; I need to talk to you and Spencer. Her face looks panicked, but I stop her before she can open her mouth.

"I've tried so hard all my life to be the perfect child, I've even gone as far as mommy daughter ballet classes, and I'm a boy. But we all make mistakes, I've made many, of course, you don't see them mom because I want to be the perfect son you always dreamed of. I tried to keep to happy all my life and be the man of the house, and be what you always wanted me to be. I did the above and beyond I tried." I stop and look at their confusion, my mom is almost in tears.

"Well I'm sorry mom, I made a mistake I cant fix and I cant take it back, I know you feel like I'm a waste now but I'm sorry. And Spencer you can blame me if you want, but just don't take her away from me, Carly means so much to me, before we came here I made a big decision and asked her to be my wife and I'm going to try my best at being father." I say ending my long speech my mother has tears running down her face and Spencer looks more serious than I've ever seen him look ever.

"She's pregnant isn't she?" Spencer says in a raspy dry voice. I don't need to answer, a tear just rolls down my face. He gets up and puts an arm on my back. "It's okay man!"

"I'm sorry mom," I say as she bawls her eyes out. Right then, I wanted to sit there and bawl my eyes out with her but I have to stay strong for her, Carly, and the baby.

Spencer walks over and grabs my moms hand and she stands and cries in his shirt. He looks at me, as if asking "what to do?" I shrug and walk over to her and wrap my arms around her.

"It's my entire fault." She says through tears "I pushed you so hard to be perfect and." She stops to catch her break and try to stop crying "You probably felt so pressured and oh poor Carly," tear break "I did this!" she says crying harder.

I couldn't believe my ears, I thought she would blame Carly and think that I would never do such a thing, but complete opposite. I rub her back until she calms down, Spencer brings her some water, and eventually she stops crying.

It starts to rain outside, as if the weather is following my mood, the rain is pounding on the windows, and lightning and thunder crack in the sky. My mom is on the couch she brought over some pajamas and slept on the couch. I'm reading the baby book that Carly has been asking me to read and Spencer is trying to find a bucket for a leak in the ceiling. I look up when I see Carly on the stairs.

"I couldn't sleep," she says walking down barefoot in a large oversized shirtdress.

"This book is pretty interesting." I say turning the page as she comes behind me and sits her chine on my shoulder.

"I liked it, don't read chapter eight though, that even grossed me out and I'm a girl." I know she's smiling I can feel her smile in the room.

"Carly!" Spencer says walking into the room.

"Spencer!" she says as he throws his arms around her.

"Listen, Freddie told us and whatever you need were here for you okay?"

"Okay, I love you so much Spencer." She says and kiss his cheek her ring glistening in the light.

"I know you guys plan on getting married and I think that's a very important choice you're making and it's the right thing to do I'm for all it." Carly wraps an arm around him.

"You're the best, Shay! She says smiling. "Freddie!" I say breaking the moment slightly panicked.

"What?" he says looking up from his book.

"We left the groceries in the car!" We all stare at each other and burst out in laughter, just like the old days.

**Endnotes**

**Wow, I read that twice, can't believe I actually wrote that, I like it! Anyway, I would like to clear up any confusion you're having with the dates posted at the top of the previous chapters, please void those because it is not correct its not August its ear;y July and she's three months, sorry for the confusion! **

**Well, I hope this was enjoyed, please leave a review, or I just might not update**

**Ever **

**Again. **

**~iLiveiBreatheiCarly~ **


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